One loud voice...

If only i know it earlier, i would be more than what i am now. But now i can feel the true echo in my voice that transcends all the elements and a tree can be uprooted because of that. Can something be uprooted with one loud voice? Definitely not! But if that loud voice echoing the concern of those who can contribute to that one mission, then the vision can be realised in the quickest and fastest time and way possible.

one and one thousand...

As one goes up in whatever capacity, position, age, or anything, he or she is bound to be blessed (though not always) with one feeling, thought, emotion, or whatever close feeling with another. As opposed to those who has just new to something the figure could be thousand or more. As with me, I am no exception.Despite the realization came late in my lifetime, I am very much one with others, be it in words, actions, and perceptions. Some would look at me with odd feeling thinking I am just like them, a thousand reason not to link with others. As a lecturer, realizing that, it has become my responsibility to eliminate those thousand till the ONE and ONLY ONE is very much in the forefront of their creations, actions, and decisions. So now it is one versus thousand. Can you won them over? And that could be the reason as to why the response is not forthcoming. Surprisingly so when I think it is supposed to be so. They are still in the process of eliminating the thousand towards the one and ONE.

merangkak keluar cerita semalam..

Ternampak gambar lama dan gambar itu adalah gambar ketika belajar di Wisconsin Amerika Syarikat. Aneh. Gambar di musim sejuk itu berkata seribu keadaan mental dan fizikal. Keghairahan dalam banyak perkara terasa dan terbayang kembali. Cinta dan kasih terhadap ilmu tercetus menyebabkan masa berlalu begitu pantas. Teringat kawan kawan, teringat akan hidup yang lurus dan ada yang membelit, sendirian jauh dari keluarga. Semua itu lintasan datang kembali tapi menghiburkan. Itu juga hanya kenangan yang tidak boleh berpatah balik. So are those with whom I have encountered when I was there. I played my role and so are they. Where are they now?

pagi yang berkata kata...

Di pagi hari banyak benda yang berkata kata. Tatkala itulah saya dapat mendengar bisikan dan gambaran sesuatu di samping memberi terjemahan kepada apa yang nampak dan dibisikan. Aneh tapi benar. Kebanyakan bisikan dan gambaran memberi terjemahan kepada sesuatu dan sesuatu itu menjadi kenyataan. Tak kiralah soal apa, kawan, kasih sayang terhadap seseorang, ilham terhadap sesuatu, selang seberapa ketika jelmaan sebenarnya terjadi. Ada orang kata itu hasilan dari fikiran positif. Ia ke? Tulisan ini merupakan satu lagi lapisan yang terselak dan perkara yang selama ini tidak terkupas dalam bentuk ayat yang betul. Tapi syukurlah setelah sekian lama, pagi ini tertulislah kata kata yang mengkisahkan pagi yang sememangnya berkata kata..

WHY?

Couldn't help asking why. Just cannot figure out events that have so much similarities and a significant degree of personal impact. Feel like it was yesterday. And it is today. And it is still happening. For me? If it is not for me then it is for whom? So young yet have the semblance of somebody I have encountered long time ago. But why this time? And why now? I can't help asking. WHY?

counting own numbers...

Be it good, bad, and evil, everybody is counting their numbers. Some called it planning. Others called it fate. I called it love at first sight. Others called it love at first smile. What about the first touch? All are in the counting and the calculation. The intelligent one does the calculation. And majority only do the counting. I do both plus an analysis of what has happened and what ought to happen. Counting + calculation + analysis. It adds up to what? Don't know. I might start doing the counting my own numbers again. It must lead to somewhere and something. Hope in good time, it is some kind of a true love...

I am my own happinesss..

It is not being shared. The secrets are in the numbers. Too many yet too few. Too near yet so far. Many is a death distance away. I have my own calculation. I have my own expectation. I have my own interpretation. So are them. But they are more of their own worldly manipulation. Not a minute. Not a second. Not a number indicating I am a part. I have never been shared. In their existence, in their silence, I am just a minus and never been a plus. Am I only a death apart away? Anyway, it is only a painful part of a learning process. In death one has to be on his or her own leaving everything behind. Question is, are they blessed with the sensation of oneness? Life + death? Everybody is in their own numbers. So are mine. I am my own feel and I am own doing. I am my own own life. I am my own death. And naturally I am my own happiness.

Ayat yang suci...

Al-Quran dan ayat suci..Sudah kebiasaan kita mendengar ayat suci dan dikaitkan dengan Al-Quran. Islam mengajar kita dengan mengamalkan ayat ayat suci sebagaimana terkandung dalam Al-Quran. Bukan sekadar dibaca tetapi di amalkan untuk mengeratkan pertalian sesama manusia. Semoga bulan Ramadan membawa lebih pengertian kepada kita tujuan tujuan ayat ayat suci tersebut. Semalam saya banyak melontarkan ayat ayat suci kepada pelajar yang membawa erti kasih dan sayang. Adakah ini permulaan kepada kefahaman dan amalan kepada ayat ayat suci sebagaimana terkandung dalam Al Quran? Saya memohon keampunan dari Allah Yang Maha Mengetahui dan telah memulakan dengan bacaan Surah Fatihah yang menggambarkan senerio kasih sayang, mengharapkan satu perjalanan hidup yang diberkati.

Salam Ramadan dan Selamat Mengerjakan Ibadah Puasa.

the fourth wave..

What is the fourth wave? It is a place where the heart does not go to sleep. The highway is without speed limit, and the lust on everything is just faceless, boneless, and shadowless. Can be a killer. Comes quietly. Leaving the scene with no shadow of a doubt. Lurks everywhere and at any time it can jump on someone. Heartless? But who cares. It has been like that for a long time but awaits for that moment. Nobody cares. Everybody loves the kingdom where a magician is the ruler but stop short in being a king. He rules by the rule where no decree has ever been proclaimed. Why? The king is in everybody and in everything. Heart rules.

a loose belief...

It has been created for a reason or reasons. And what are those reasons? Till then it is going to be a loose belief in that something. For reasons only the marketer is aware of, the customers `unite' in the brand or brands they cherished, the supermarket they go to, the promotion they can be personally identified with, and the price that stood for their life style. Yes, in terms of personal needs and wants they are very much united. But what about values that can unite them both on earth and heaven? Is it still a loose belief?

gangguan...

Mereka yang terganggu dan diganggu. Dan mereka mengucapkan syukur kepada Allah kerana melimpahkan kurniaan kepadanya rezeki dalam pelbagai bentuk, rupa, dan juga perasaan akal dan fikiran. Tetapi masih lagi ada yang merasakan diri mereka terganggu walaupun diberi limpahan rezeki walaupun sudah seberapa berbanding dengan orang lain. Lantas mereka tidak bersatu dalam perkara basic atau dalam perkara asas dalam kehidupan. Nilai kejiranan dan ziarah diketepikan. Nilai bertegur sapa sesama ahli keluarga, kawan lama juga dipandang tidak penting. Malah terdapat bekas pelajar yang sudah mendabik dada kesombongan kerana kejayaan harta dunia yang tidak seberapa dan telah melupai tempat dan siapa mengajar mereka.

Dan yang paling menyayat ada yang telah melupai ibu bapa mereka. Mereka ini semua `bersatu'. Tetapi bersatu di atas perkara yang selama ini dirasakan merupakan gangguan yang tidak bertempat. Ada yang `bersatu teguh' kerana kemewahan harta dunia. Ada `keteguhan' kerana aspek aspek sosial, juga politik, dan tidak kurang juga kerana `budaya songsang' sesuatu dan ianya pula merupakan raja segala pengaruh dalam tindak tanduknya. Sedikit sebanyak saya juga tidak terkecuali dari gangguan gangguan tersebut. Kepada Allah saya memohon keampunan dan perjalanan yang penuh dengan kerberkatan.

Tetutup sudah...

Atau tertutup satu dengan sengaja dan tidak, maka yang satu lagi yang tidak dijangka akan terbuka. Apa itukah prinsip ilmu baik kepada kehidupan atau prinsip kepada semua benda dan perjalanan? Open to one and closes to another. And when the time comes, it closes for ever...it closes to everything..And are you prepared for that day or night?

keluarga..

Saya mengajar `marketing.' Adakala saya terasakan masyarakat di Malaysia tidak berlaku adil terhadap unsur kekeluargaan dalam hal banyak benda. Kita banyak bercakap pasal hal hal kekeluargaan. Tapi di peringkat bidang ilmu dan profesion, kita tidak memaparkannya sebagaimana sepatutnya. Gambar yang di paparkan lebih merupakan kejayaan individu dan tidak menampakkan peranan keluarga dalam menentukan kejayaan seseorang itu. Begitu juga dalam percakapan dan perbuatan.


Pemasaran merupakan bidang yang merangkum soal keluarga sehingga ke peringkat bawah dan apa jua. Itu adalah persepsi kebanyakan masyarakat barat. Kehidupan seseorang tidak sempurna jika kita membelakangkan ahli ahli dalam keluarga. Soal jual beli banyak menggambarkan kekeluargaan jika barang atau perkhidmatan itu hendak dilihat mesra dalam erti kata yang sebenarnya. Iklan dan promosi banyak berteraskan kekeluargaan. Adakah itu satu gimik?Tetapi apa yang sering tercetus di sini adalah hanya soal kemiskinan lazimnya dikaitkan dengan keluarga. Mengapa tidak dikaitkan dengan kekayaan sesorang? Ada, tapi lazimnya hanya individu tersebut yang ditonjolkan.


Baru baru ini kita dikejutkan dengan kisah pembunuhan di dalam kereta yang dikategorikan sebagai kes bunuh dan bunuh diri. Yang seorang ialah lelaki berumur 64 tahun dan seorang lagi seorang perempuan berusia 43 tahun. Terkilan juga rasanya kerana hanya selepas peristiwa begini sesorang itu dilihat dari sudut keluarga. Adakah kita berlaku adil?

Stop short...

One's life crosses another. A happy life process is then a dream. Things can fall apart even in the beginning the care is with the father and the mother. The baby is at their mercy before the individual is `thrown out' to the society to be taken care of. Make, break, or for sale? Life can be getting worse or it can become a dream comes true. Lots of power and lots of money does the good job and a process can have its completion. As with the rest, it is a stop short and cut short stories that can lead to a turmoil of untold pain and sufferings. Questions asked but the solutions can be a social, political, and economic burden. It leads to another process cycle, a short one and can be disastrous to many. And a question pops up, what does she or he wants from me? I can figure out the answer. But out of deep respect, it stops short of...

thought direction..signing out..

I have been trying to understand my thought direction for quite sometime. And I am also trying to understand others. And I am also trying to understand the `introvervism' in others and the `extroverism' in me. I am somewhat fast and quick in the interaction between in and out of my thought. But my thought direction is at best because it strikes at the source that is outside and the transference is perfect because the inside is all perfect and clear. Is that the reason as to why I have no boundary in me seeing things? It is because I have been living outside. My thoughts are outside. What about inside your mind? If it is perfect then I don't feel a thing because i can see everything. What a thought direction? Feel much happier. Signing out..