symbolized existence..?

Has it been symbolic all along? Everything and everybody is a symbolic for something. Or has it been real? But why the real touch is impossible? Only in feel and feeling. The meaning attached is different. So is the day. So is every single day from day one. It has to be different, physically and mentally. And today symbolized my freedom that expands the mind territory equitably to efforts and thoughts expanded for the past 65 years, or 23,935 days! And what would be the world like after today, 31 July 2013, 22 Ramadan 1434H? Allah is Great. Allahuakbar.

Note: symbolized - it stands for some meaning..

the pick of the mind..the ripples of the heart..Jack the ripper...

It can be a very small, tiny things that eyes can't see, to things that are big and gigantic that can be very obvious and visible. It can be something conceptual, perceptual, or just anything physical, geographic, and demographic. Whatever the picks, all has its roots to something real and fantasies, conscious and unconscious. Can be behavioral or just has been there for centuries. We are just a picker with mind and the brain that goes down to the very reason as to why we are being created. The very mentioning of it creates a ripple in the heart separating the good, the bad, and the evil. Allah is Great. Allahuakabar.

terdiam...

Bercerita sahaja terhadap dan tentang sesuatu perkara, sudah pasti perkara itu ada perlawanan dan persaingannya. Kalau kita bercerita mengenai kekayaan, sudah pasti kita tidak dapat mengelak dari menjengok dunia kemiskinan. Bercakap pasal ada dan memiliki sesuatu, di luar sana ramai yang tidak memiliki apa yang kita miliki.

Syukur Alhamdullilah, dengan pengetahuan yang di anugerah oleh Allah, kesemua itu membuat kita diam seketika. Mengapa diam? Berlawanan tetapi tetap bersaing dalam menguasai sesuatu terhadap yang lain. Kita kena bersaing, kita kena berlawan. Elemen persaingan inilah menyebabkan manusia sentiasa bangun dan berusaha mengatasi segala halangan dan rintangan. Yang tidak berkaki akan berusaha mencari kaki seperti orang lain yang berkaki. Yang miskin akan berusaha mencari kekayaan. Yang tertindas akan berusaha mengatasi situasi penindasan ini.

 Manusia mudah lupa. Orang berkaki lupa akan orang yang tidak berkaki. Yang memerintah lupa akan rakyat yang gelisah. Lantas Allah Yang Maha Berkuasa lagi Menguasai Segala-GalaNya akan membawa Kebenaran tidak mengira masa, keadaan, dan zaman. Allahuakbar.

how would you consider a pain is a pain...?

The degree of pain in someone is unknown to another. My pain is invariably no pain at all to others. Vice versa. But there is one category of pain that can make the difference, that is, your pain is my pain. I can feel it and I can sense it. It is being seen as a bond between two persons.Wonder how many out there are in serious pain for something but in actual fact can't be felt by others? Allahuakbar.

tidak sama ombak menghempas pantai...

Seketika dan selepas itu ombak yang lain datang menerpa. Yang tadi hilang di bawa waktu hanya meninggalkan kesan dan kenangan yang berbagai. Kalau kecil ombaknya, maka ia akan berlaku dan berlalu begitu sahaja. Sekelip mata. Juga dan jika gelombang tsunami yang menghempas, kesan dan kenangan akan terasa sampai bila bila. Impak ombak tsunami akan mencipta sejarah di peringkat negara dan keluarga. Allahuakbar.

today is not today...

It seems that is how I feel about today, yesterday, and tomorrow. My hand phone continues sending me messages on my car installment that is due. Life is not perfect. Overdue in something has become the order of the day. It stresses so much on the word of economy and money. Management of time, in culture, in social, and in person, has well being taken over by gadgets in smart phones and tablets. Getting things done on time is no more a priority and no more a dignity. Money can't help but the true savior of life is in the nature of one's created life and breadth. The secret lies in the manner one has been created and being cheated (?). Growth and development of oneself is supposedly to be a natural process of adaptation to time and place. No matter where and when, the essence of success still lies in oneself, with and without the modern gadget. Allah is Great, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful, the Knows All. Allahuakbar.

concerns....

Look at the manner politicians manage their concerns. Ugly and dirty. And making things worse, their concern has become your concern and to some extent to the society at large.  Despite the `beauty' in the solution, the matter just do not go concurrently with the spirit of togetherness and unity. Have they failed to see what is the truth of the matter? Kepada Allah kita memohon Taufik dan Hidayah. Allahuakbar.

luaran...

We talk a lot about thought and thinking. But are we really into it? Much say than done. I am what I am. But I am not what they see I am. It is all in the outer part in everything that matters. It does not sink deep into the skin, the physical self, and the physical environment.  Only a chosen few that has the privilege to change this world, inside and outside. They see differently. Allah Yang Maha Berkuasa lagi Menguasai Segala-GalaNya. Allahuakbar.

deep seats...?

Most of the time I took a back seat, mentally. Almost in everything? But if mind goes unchecked, it tilted, unbalanced and tend to play a dirty game for reasons least understood at that time. Preferably a back seat to front seat. Why? And worst still the back seat phenomenal has become deep seated that can make life miserable and aimless.  Am I married to one? Or am I born to members of family who has this kind of mind `syndrome'? Or is it just a momentary attitude? A married partner is a partner of active thoughts and actions. So are members of the family, especially the closed ones. A collective mental set might dictate the path taken, one after the other. Despite the strength I possess, there are times I have been in a situation not believing in something I really can. Ada masa tidak mempercayai nasi sudah terhidang di atas meja untuk saya menikmatinya !!  Not this time. Kepada Allah saya memohon Petunjuk dan Hidayah. Saya memohon Keampunan dan Kekuatan. Allahuakbar.

selfish..?

I want to ride and drive as a bad person. But with Allah's help, what more it is Ramadan, I turn out to be a good person after all. For a while, I have been bothered by what my actions would be before 31 July 2013. That very day shall be my last day at UiTM as a lecturer. I am quitting for good. My gratefulness to Allah for being created the person I am. Allahuakbar.

bankruptcy...

When life is very much the world of works, money, and lifestyle, people tend to see things  in many and wrong images of existence. It is not a question of be true to oneself, but now  it has become a world of dreams and fantasies. The root of all evils comes from money. When evil takes over the godly sense in living, life then is moving towards a situation called bankruptcy. Manusia bergelut dengan dosa  lebih dari pahala. Mohon keampunan dan petunjuk dari Allah. Allahuakbar.

meant to be...

Even in the latest episode of going to travel to another place, I have never been presented the proper way. Or it is in the proper manner, everything remains intact. Start questioning, and found myself only ceremonial figure just to have something happen. Am I? I am what I think I am. But you are also what others and they meant to be. Everybody is part of each other. The world is in place for you alone and nobody else but for you alone. But with the presence of others however, whenever, whatever they have come to your life, you are what you are meant to be. Allahuakbar.

being told...

A bottle is a bottle if it does not break. If it breaks, it is no longer a bottle. Why should  a bottle breaks? The hand that hold a bottle is no longer has a strong grip and thus it slips and broke to pieces. A lot of reasons contribute to a breakage. A unified whole in a bottle or in anything for that matter in the context of physical, economy, culture, and social, does not come naturally. We have to be together in order to be strong. Kepada Allah kita memohon keampunan dan pertolongan. Allah Yang Maha Berkuasa lagi Menguasai Segala-GalaNya. Allahuakbar.

News to ponder:  Detroit, once the fourth largest city in USA is filing for bankruptcy... debts is in billions..

Jelmaan keuntungan...

Di segi fizikal, wang ringgit, tidaklah seberapa. Di segi kerohanian, saya, masyarakat, dan orang lain, perniagaan telah membawa kepada pengertian sejuta makna. Adakah itu jelmaan keuntungan yang sebenarnya? Kekayaan kefahaman adalah merupakan kekayaan yang membuat kesemua masa dan keadaan itu indah. Penuh dengan sejuta pengertian. Allahuakbar.

tetanya...

Kepada yang sihat, kita hanya tertanya apabila melihat orang lain yang sakit, berlapar, dan dengan penderitaan yang tersendiri. Bilakah kesemua soalan yang tertanya itu akan dijawab dan terjawab? Lumrahnya manusia sememangnya begitu dalam keadaan yang tersendiri dan tidak mendekati yang lain, jauh dari memahaminya. Sesungguhnya Allah Yang Maha Mengetahui akan Segala-GalaNya.  Akan tiba masanya apabila  kesemua soalan akan terjawab dengan sendirinya. Tetapi mengapa sekarang terasa dan dirasai sedangkan hidup yang terdahulu dipenuhi dengan peluang untuk merasainya? Allahuakbar.

crystal clear...

Despite the clarity of events and episodes, words and sayings, actions and actings, the heart is still running good. It weighs on the lighter side of things and just refuse to make a harsh conclusion.  Tangan yang banyak memberi telah di balas dengan sembahan lada. Why has it to be so? Can it be just seen as `debu debu kehidupan yang dapat mengabui mata sesiapa buat seketika?'  Allah is Great. Seeks Allah Forgiveness for the wrongdoings committed. Allah Yang Maha Pengasih. Allah Yang Maha Penyayang. Allahuakbar.

from each to its own...

However hard one tried to break the barrier, the success is indeed lies in the principle of from each to its own.  I am created as such and here I am writing all these. Not more not less. Feel weird sometimes but that is the way it is. From each to its own. Allahuakbar.

scaling a new height...

And this time there is no looking back. And this time there shall be little time to sleep. Despite what others or culture says, it has to be pushed through just to prove a point. I am here to see it pushed to the limits. Someplace, somewhere, and sometime, argument shall not be entertained. It is their unjust world and as it is now, the just world that matters. Every right to live, hear and see things through, your way. Can you see things if you were to go to sleep? Allah is Great. Allahuakbar.

businesses with the dead...

No multiplication, no additions, and no specific formula and strategy to go by. Just plain emptiness yet simple in everything. So easy it seems lacking in urgent needs. They are all dead persons. And they are all your customers. I have never been keen and serious on any decisions. It just work either backwards or forward.  But it works wonder. Does it really matter? The dead is a big market. And the money just do not register. Know why? With the dead it registers every time. Allahuakbar.

the ancient form of positioning and reasoning...

Pyramid is one. Menara Kuala Lumpur is another. All these are examples of human positioning of their life and death. They are set to do a positioning that are very much belongs to an ancient thoughts, thinking and reasoning. Allah brings us the Ramadan month of fasting. Why has it to be a fasting month? One obvious reason is to put a stop to the practice of ancient thoughts, thinking, linking and reasoning. If it is meant to be, don't make one suffer. Such an easy tip for those who can and can't.  It is just you and the direct link with Allah and with nothing in between. Allahuakbar.

we don't speak the same language...

Who speaks the same language as mine? What I meant is language of my heart, mind, and soul, all in the natural courses of felt, feeling, and emotion. Hearing, listening, talking, and writing. Are you? Then join me. I have yet to hear a response. Allahuakbar.

sincerity...

There are things that we do that spells the natural course of selfishness, insincerity, and insensitivity. Some are just the opposite. Happiness can be the result of the combination of both. Take it naturally and it takes a natural course of long life and longevity. But an unfortunate some, take it and they die a  natural course of do and dont's. So start listening and try to understand both the courses of events. Allahuakbar.

logic reversed..

Nobody thinks in reversed. Why not, to stay healthy I have to walk backwards. The answers to almost all secrets we must use the technique of logic reversed. I do not write but all along it has been written before the actual writing takes place. Allahuakbar.

gets heated up...

One of their stories. But what kind of stories do they held on me? Just one of the same stories? Don't really feel the heated up in the real sense of their word. Just a lay by, just a stand by, or just a bye-bye. Am I not a man in the middle of this thing and that thing? But why the events and those days? Is it not only meant for me? But why the feel the way I still felt? Should I feel that way? Then how should I feel? Allahuakbar?

the dots are connected...

There are times when heart says the right thing. It sees the differences and it senses the reality, internal and external. Steve Job, the inventor of Apple and  I Pad says, follow your heart, and  all the dots of experiences are then connected. Really? Hanya Allah Yang Maha Berkuasa lagi Menguasai Segala-GalaNya. Allahuakbar.

Strategy and the big picture...

Wonder why I must have a strategy. Well, life is a big picture of doing things you do and others are doing that too. So think of a strategy of making the best for both you and others. Strategically managed would make life better that benefits you and others. Allahuakbar.

just not there...

Despite the obvious of oneness that belie the secret of our existence, the spirit of 'we' is indeed not anywhere to be near in their works and in the words. Too obsessed with one's luck in the perceived roles, status, position, the presence of the elderly and the dead has been obviously ignored and discarded, thus sensing the presence of a gaping hole in the very reason of why they should be there in the first place. Kepada Allah kita memohon petunjuk, keampunan, taufik dan hidayah. Allahuakbar.

not in the same wave length...

Can never be. Nobody speaks the same language. Be it near or be it far, one can never understands another. Am I asking too much? Allahuakbar.

the source of pain...

It is just simple. Don't really follow the man-made rule of 1,2,3, a, b, c. Just total it up wherever and whenever possible. But still sees rule number 1, business must be with a mission, goals, objectives and the breakdown to it. Is it necessary? Life is just a simple living and a simple dying. But why still living to the rule of 1 is how much and 2 is how much. Do I have to count, follow, and observe on rule that seems to dictate? That can be the source of pain, you know. Whereas the total to  everything is very clear and obvious. Kepada Allah saya memohon petunjuk dan hidayah. Allahuakbar.

missing you...

I would not be missing those days. Why? Because those old days are back in time. And I am back to the fold of what I have undergone during my younger days. But this time with a difference. The shirts and the songs are not  about abang abang, adik adik, kakak kakak, but about the silent killer in all fields of endeavor. We seem to be united, but we don't. Wonder what they are up to, and where exactly I am heading. Kepada Allah saya memohon taufik dan hidayah dalam segala perkara. Berilah hamba Mu ini Keampunan. Allahuakbar.

Terubat sebelum sakit...

I have it all. And I have undergone pain that does not seem as one. As for the ordinary, it could be a killing affair, to the last bone in the grave. But it is cured before I could feel the pain. Allahuakbar.

bertaut...

Tidak pernah ku rasakan perasaan begini. Di rasakan bertautnya kekuatan yang mana jurang pemishahannya adalah masa yang begitu panjang. Kesemuanya membawa makna kepada kehidupan yang mana pada mulanya tidak bersahaja dan tidak berketentuan. Rupa rupanya keseluruhan  kehidupan disulam dengan makna yang mana sumbernya adalah dari Allah Yang Maha Berkuasa lagi Menguasai Segala-Galanya. Allahuakbar.