heaven...

Heaven as it is, open and unblocked by anything. Just a fresh air to breathe. Do I need anything in substitute of what I can openly say and see on anything? Even I can walk on anything.  And do I have to bent myself for a small thing like a hand phone? I am not going to be cowed by thoughts that could saddened my life by just saying something on the phone. The place is here in the open - and that is heaven. Wallahualam. Allahuakbar.

mistakes..?

Mistakes - could it be a presentation too late? Could it also be a revelation too late? A savior of one kind, a supreme, heavenly, so to speak has come to the rescue. Wallahualam. Penuh kesyukuran. Allahuakbar.

mendengar MU, menurut perintah MU, Ya Allah..

Keseumanya membuat aku meredai apa yang terjadi. Dirasakan aku lebih terbuka bila mendengar azan berkumandang menandakan masuk fardhu Magrib. Janganlah lagi aku menjenguk kegelapan dalam kemarahan yang tidak megenal erti keredaan dan sempadan akan apa yang telah terjadi. Sesungguhnya sekarang aku lebih mengenal diri aku sendiri dan tidak akan mengulangi kesilapan yang telah pun lama berlalu. It might be too many and too long to reach you. But is that not a quality much sought after? Wallahualam. Allahuakbar.

dalam persamaan dalam perbezaan..what a beautiful world...

Kita bergerak ke arah yang sama. Justeru kita tidak sangat dalam persamaan. Kita tidak juga dalam perbezaan. Keterlampauan membawa kepada hentinya gerakan yang besar itu. Mengapa tersenyum? Mungkin itulah damai kepada perbezaan dan juga pada persamaan. Wallahualam. Allahuakbar.

only myself in the mirror...

I have only myself to see in the mirror. Do they see me too? Surely not. What more I am an old man..But do they think as an old man have I  forgetting the past? Have I?  Depite being a man in the mirror for so long, I have never seen any other person sharing and looking in the mirror together. Wallahualam. Allah Yang Maha Pengasih. Allah Yang Mah Penyayang. Allahuakbar.

when comes to discipline..just beware of 'black holes' either it is in you or in others...be a winner..

Never ever exaggerate in indulgence thinking of leisure and pleasure. Semoga Allah menolong saya dalam pencapaian disiplin yang begini dan memohon penambahan rezeki bagi tujuan memperiratkan lagi silaturrahim antara anak beranak dan saudara mara dan seterusnya kepada masyarakat. InsyaAllah. Allahuakbar.

flashback and time for summing up..?

Time of summing up, and there are those who can be placed in an imminent situation of thesis and analysis. Or should they be given a second chance of actions and decisions? The right of change is with everybody. Semoga sentiasa dalam Pertolongan dan PerlindunganNYA. Allahuakbar.

Lee Kuan Yew, founder of modern Singapore, dies at 91...

Lee Kuan Yew, Singapore's first prime minister and architect of the tiny Southeast Asian city-state's rapid rise from British tropical outpost to global trade and financial center, died early on Monday, aged 91, the Prime Minister's Office said. "Mr Lee passed away peacefully at the Singapore General Hospital today at 3.18 A.M," a statement said. Lee, a Cambridge-educated lawyer, is widely credited with building Singapore into one of the world's wealthiest nations on a per capital basis with a strong, pervasive role for the state and little patience for dissent.

P/s: Masih teringat ungkapan kata kata apabila Singapura keluar dari gagasan Malaysia- 'pastinya Singapura keluar dari Malaysia seperti matahari terbit'.

a thought dimension...

This thought dimension could be seen as a dimension where a thorough analysis of what has happened. I have done this. I have done that. They see me as doing this. They see me as doing that. Then who am I? You can become what you are before. But with Allah's Power I can become what I was not who I am before. Hanya pada Sisi Mu Ya Allah terletak segala Rahsia Kejadian Mu Ya Allah. Allahuakbar.

finding my sovereignty..

Everybody has their sovereignty on something. I have mine. Looking at what I am compare to what I was, I have a soveriegnty that no one can share with me. Should they? Wallahualam. Hanya Allah Yang Maha Berkuasa lagi Berkuasa Ke atas Segala-Galanya. Allahuakbar.

nisbah...

I did learn something today. I did learn what ratio means. Not so much my main source of inspiration though when deciding on something. But today I do looked upon a ratio of something to something could dictate what I should do. And I just could not dismissed the matter at hand as though no question of ratio is attached. It is part of it. Sesungguhnya Allah Yang Maha Mengetahui. Allahuakbar.

mysteries....

Time does solve mysteries. It relates differently to different people and to different individuals. I for one has not been trained with what time to other people. And the mysteries are no mysteries to me. But as of today I must looked upon things as mysteriously placed. And you must not take it lightly. For in time capsules the answers could be gauged and solved. Wallahualam. Allahuakbar

At the end of something...

At the end of something there is nothing that you can claim is yours. If you do, sooner or later it would be reduced to nothing. What we called success is always a mystery to everybody. I don't have a claim on anything. I might be asking for something. But soon it would be taken from me only reducing it to memory and knowledge. Thus at the end of something is not nothing. It must be something and that something is knowledge. Wallahulam. Allahuakbar.

Imperfect..

What actually is the difference between perfect and imperfect? All this time I have been misled by the word 'imperfect'.  When comes to everything in this world, nothing is imperfect. So why the obsession with perfect? But one scenario can be perfect. Born perfect and death is perfect. Not only perfect but it is complete. Wallahualam. Allahuakbar.

jika kita melanggar banyak sangat pantang larang...

Pantang dan berpantang merupakan satu satu perlakuan manusia yang cuba menahan dirinya dari melakukan sesuatu. Jika ianya dilakukan, persepsi nya adalah ianya akan membawa mudarat kepada dirinya. Adakah ianya benar? Jika ianya benar, mengapa ianya sepatutnya dihalang dari melakukannya? Wallahualam. Sesungguhnya hanya Allah Yang Maha Mengetahui. Allahuakbar.

an open world..an open wound...

Everybody seems to have an open wound which can bring them to nowhere if they so chosen. I have mine. And carrying another person's wound is just a drag. It makes me feel the world so small confining to problems that should not be mine. It is theirs. Sesungguhnya Allah Maha Berkuasa Ke atas Segala-Galanya. Allahuakbar.

halal dan haram..

Aku tidak boleh ubah sejarah. Aku kena meredainya. Dirasakan haram untuk bertindak sedemikian rupa kerana ada unsur keterlampauan padanya. Jadi jelas ianya haram kan? Yang terdahulu dari itu macam mana? Ada yang dihalalkan kerana terlalu banyak perkara telah diperlakukan. Lantas mereka menyedarinya. Ada yang halal. Ada yang haram. Tapi mengapa masih melakukannya? Adakah ianya diluar batasan bagi tindak tanduk aku. Adakah ianya haram? Wallahualam. Hanya kepada Allah dipohon Pertolongan dan Perlindungan. Allahuakbar.

merindui...

Sangat aneh bagi seseorang kerana merindui sesuatu atau seseorang. Apa yang aku rindukan? Tentu ada. Tapi sangat sukar untuk memperkatakannya. Yang jelas bila kita merindui sesuatu atau seseorang, kita sangat bersendirian. Sangat mengharap agar yang lepas itu jika boleh dikunjung semula, dapat merobah perjalanan hidup yang dirasakan salah dan silap. Wallahualam. Allahuakbar.

semasa kecil..dan umur sekarang..inklusif..?

Ada benda dan perkara yang berlaku semasa kecil tidak sangat difahami akan akibat sesuatu keputusan itu. Perkara dan benda itu mungkin memiliki unsur politik, unsur, ekonomi, unsur sosial, atau unsur peribadi, baik dan tidak baik aku tidak tahu. Tetapi penuh kesyukuran dengan berusia sudah 67 tahun, baru difahami samaada keputusan mereka semasa aku kecil itu betul atau tidak dan yang sangat di syukuri adalah ianya ianya diberkati oleh Mu, ya Allah. Wallahualam. Allahuakbar.

kebebasan...

Pengertian kebebasan adalah berbeza kepada semua orang. Saya tidak terkecuali. Kebebasan kepada saya adalah membawa diri kedepan tanpa ikatan yang membelenggukan. Walaupun ada yang telah 'menggilakan' saya sebelum ini, yang pasti saya tidak akan menoleh kebelakang walaupun kegetiran sangat terkesan dan terasa. Others are with their own 'freedom' and are tarnished with cruelties that are difficult to forget. And so I am but with a difference. What is that difference? Semoga saya sentiasa dalam Perlindungan dan PertolonganNYA dalam menuju Jalan yang Lurus. Allahuakbar.

Adakah hati ini dengan sendiri terdidik kuat...?

Ada cuba meracuni, ada cuba menggatal, ada berusaha membiarkan dan mengagagalkan, kesemuanya tidak berupaya melemahkan hati ini yang sudah terdidik kuat. Hati ini sudah merasai situasi dan senerio keadaan yang tidak terduga cubaannya, tetapi keberkatan dari Allah Subahanawataala. hati ini bangun melawan segala  bentuk ruapa perang yang diisytihar dan yang tidak diistihar.  Sesungguhnya hati ini tidak mengenal apa itu belakang dalam langkah, ianya terus kedepan menuju dan dgn harapan memenuhi tuntutan Allah. Allahuakbar.

prelude to death..

I am writing about death. And this time it is about prelude to death. Just recalling those days when my father got sick and the rest is a dying process. Life tend to be isolated and remembering is no longer the luxury of his life. There are a lot of indications when life tends to lonely and alone in certain endeavor. Appreciation has not become some sort of a taboo compared to those days when it does matters. Is it good or is is it bad? An acceptable prelude or anything for that matter? Allah is Great. Allahuakbar.

at the end of something...

At the end of something is just nothing. Is it? The so-called zest, happiness, and even sadness is just nothing the moment it is yours. The rule is automatic, in Islam what is yours is not yours. At the end of riches is just nothing. At the end of a day is sleeping. Is it not just nothing? At the end of talking is talking. No. It could be sadness. It could be anger. At the end of Iraq Saddam Hussein's presidency is ISIS. At the end of ISIS is beheading. What a sad ending. But sometimes it looks like our judgement is right. Short term yes. But after a while, even Netanyahu's Israel tend to think twice of what the world is going to be after Iran. Wallahualam. Allahuakbar.

don't react..forms, shape, and sound..

Since I am not going to be part of it, I am not to react in whatever form, shapes, and sound. And in this case it would be with no form, no shape, and no sound. I am for one tends to react quickly before and sometimes breaking all rules of reacting and humanity.You just don't have to react for now. Go slow. Drive slow. Talk slow. Or just don't say anything. Don't have to drive there the moment you hear something that you don't favor. Sesungguhnya hanya Allah Yang Maha Pengasih, Allah Yang Maha Penyayang. Allahuakbar.

death is not that difficult...

Death can be such a big item to all cultures. Just look around you, is death that difficult? Your father has died and it is almost 4 years now. Just make a recall of some of your friends. Some died very young. Some died when they are already in their middle age. And some would go into an age where mind stops functioning. I am already 67 years and going to 68. But I still write what I think should be written. What about the relevancy of what I write to those who happen to come across it and make it a point to read it? And today my age speaks my thought on my worldly position. Am I somewhere or nowhere? Wallahualam. Allahuakbar.

today on planet earth..

Seeing life in a much bigger dimension of earth planet and universe would make us more rationale of what is to come in today and tomorrow. Wallahualam. Allahuakbar.

the pain and the agony...

It was once a straight path to all my family members, friends, and acquaintances. I admit I am a person who harbor no bad faith and sentiments despite the numerous insults throw at  me now, then, and since small. I don't know whether it is intentional or otherwise. But why I do felt the agony and the pain now. It seems I am protected from fighting back the instance I am hit, then, and since small. But they know they are relentless in belittling my existence. After some time (all those years) I was made to understand the kind of persons I live with. They are all out to protect what they think are theirs. Allah is Great. And now the path once laid out for me to see them has been taken out from my sense and mind maps. I felt free with all roads now are being opened up giving me choices of yes and no. Wallahualam. Allahuakbar.

Sehingga tidak terasa buatnya...hingga tidak terasa sensasi sakitnya...

Apa yang dibuat tak terasa buatnya. Apa yang dikata tidak terasa dan tersedar apa yang dikata. Apa itukah situasi diri dalam ruang lingkup penerimaan Allah dalam apa yang dilakukan? Wallahualam. Allahuakbar.

out from the wilderness...

I am just out from it. But the test has been somewhat painful and unmajestically cruel if not for the pleasure I got from it. Allahuakbar.